The Bright Side (Blog #515)

Currently it’s 8:00 PM (central standard time), and I’m sitting at a Chili’s restaurant in the St. Louis airport. So far my travels home from Washington, DC, have gone smooth as silk. Nothing like the ones getting there. Rather, everything and everyone has run “one time.” No delays, no hangups. What’s more, after a full weekend of dancing and consequential exhaustion, I got to sleep in late this morning and do some sightseeing, since my flight didn’t leave until 6:55 this evening (eastern standard time). So it’s been a good day.

I should probably clarify my comment about sightseeing. I did NOT go to the Smithsonian or tour the monuments, although I did leave my hotel this afternoon and glanced the Jefferson and Washington monuments from my Uber. I DID, however, go to three bookstores. Lame? Maybe for some. Exciting? Definitely for me. I love a good bookstore. Plus, I discovered a super-cool antique-doorknob shop. I know, I know–you’re probably thinking, This man needs to get laid. And whereas you’d be right, I swear the doorknob store was more thrilling than it sounds. They even had some sweet gargoyle lamps!

The first bookstore I went to was just off Dupont Circle, which is basically set up like a hub or wagon wheel. Ten streets pour into a roundabout which is made up of two circles–the outer circle being for cars or pedestrians, the inner circle for pedestrians only. (Inside that area is a small park.) Well, my Uber driver dropped me off on the correct street, but the WRONG side of the circle. Of course, it wasn’t a problem to walk–I could use more walking in my life–but I had to figure a plan first, since I started to walk around the outer circle but realized that would take too long. Finally I figured it out–Make a straight line. Go to The Center first. Then you can easily find your way to wherever you want to go.

Go to The Center first.

I get so twitterpated about books. I honestly think of looking for them like an adventure. Today while walking to the second store, I ended up one street off, right by a hotel. So rather than walk AROUND the entire block, I cut through the hotel lobby. Well–I tried to at least, since the lobby didn’t open to the other side. But always determined, I nosed my way into an empty conference room and spied a door that said EXIT. At this point, the theme song to Mission Impossible started playing in my head. Slipping through the door, I immediately ran into two delivery men, but I just acted as if I was supposed to be there, on the back loading dock. Quickly, I jumped off the dock and found myself on my desired street, the one with the bookstore. Mission accomplished!

Despite my cloak-and-dagger tales in book hunting, I only bought one book from the three stores I visited. It was eight dollars. I spent more in Uber fares than I did on the book. And whereas part of me considered it all a waste for “just” one book, I had a good time. And when I went back to the hotel (where I’d stashed my bags at the front desk) and drank two beers along with lunch? I thought, Hell, I’m having a GREAT time.

But really–I don’t think the day could have gone better.

Now it’s 9:30, and I just boarded the plane for Tulsa. We’ll take off soon, so I’m rushing. Despite my wonderful day and fabulous weekend, I don’t want to be up blogging late tonight. I’m already ready to crash. But before I wrap up, here’s something–

Well, wait. I had to close my laptop for the flight, which–I guess–went well except for the fact that my bag came back damaged. Shit. One of the handles got ripped off, and the side is torn. So that sucks. But, I talked to an airline agent, and she gave me a travel voucher for $75, which I believe is what I paid for the bag. So thanks to this trip and the airline’s multiple mishaps, I now have $275 in airline dollars to spend. Whoopie.

Anyway, back to the thing I was going to tell you. Last night, about two in the morning, I asked a girl, a stranger who had glitter on her face, to dance. Then after she said yes, I told her I liked her glitter makeup. Her face lit up. “Do you want some?” she said.

I paused.

“Yes. Yes I do!”

Well, the next thing I knew, the girl (who said she was from France) started digging through her purse and covering my face and “little beard” in green glitter that EXACTLY MATCHED my shirt. Talk about fun. Even before we danced, we had this beautiful moment of kindness and creativity. An unexpected surprise. A lightening up.

Oh–by the way–I’m at my aunt’s house now, in Tulsa. It’s one in the morning. I truly am tired, and part of me is so frustrated with this trip. It really was a chore getting to DC and–honestly–exhausting to be there, despite all the fun and wonderful dances and conversations I had. I guess my body just needs a break. Ugh. Things were going so well today, and then the bag thing happened. I mean, I liked that bag. It was a gift from a friend when I announced that I was moving to Austin. And I know–I haven’t moved yet. But still, the bag matched my others. That’s important for homosexuals–matching glitter, matching bags. Okay. I’m letting it go. I’m choosing to look on the bright side. Yes, this too is an unexpected surprise. I have less baggage now.

Quotes from CoCo (Marcus)

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It takes forty years in the desert for seas to part.

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The Golden Gate Disappointment (#487)

Highlights from the last 36 hours, in no particular order–

1. Someone said I was skinny

This last weekend I attended a dance event in San Francisco, and my host toted me around on his scooter. At one point he said the scooter was easier to drive with “a little extra weight” on it. Best compliment I’ve received all month.

2. San Francisco has A LOT of hills

Yesterday I didn’t feel like taking classes and went looking for books instead. I started out just on foot, but damn if San Francisco isn’t a lot of up and down, up and down. So I ended up Lyft-ing (Lyft is like Uber or a taxi, Mom), then walking, then Lyft-ing, then walking some more. Basically, I just hunted for bookstores–I went to six in all. The amazing part? I didn’t buy a thing. Still, I had a great time (yesterday was gorgeous) and even wandered through a lovely park (Delores Park). I thought it might be the place used in the opening credits of the television show Full House, but–alas–it wasn’t. Anyway, check it out.

3. Last night was fabulous

Just before the last dance at the workshop I attended–The Switch–I had a beer with my friend who helped organize the event, then grabbed dinner. Then I had a handful of dances, all of which were delightful. (The last night of any dance event is almost always the most fun, since people are laid back, settled in, and generally too tired to put up a front or give a shit about looking better than anyone else.)

4. What the hell, Tom Collins?

After the final dance (and the scooter ride home), I walked up the steep hill where I parked Tom Collins on Friday in order to check on him. And whereas he was technically okay and I hadn’t gotten any more tickets (I got one yesterday for not turning my wheels toward the curb), the lock on Tom’s trunk wasn’t working. (This problem has happened once before, and you can read about it here.) Anyway, I futzed with the switch and latch by hand for a good twenty minutes to no avail, then ended up asking my host if he had two screwdrivers, a pair of pliers, and a wire coat hanger. Thankfully, he did. (I would have used my own tools but I left them back in Arkansas so my parents, my aunt, and I could have enough room for all our damn luggage.)

Using the tools, I took the inside panel off the trunk door. As it turns out, there are two small nuts that hold the power lock for the trunk in place, and one of them had come loose and disappeared. This means the lock was TECHNICALLY WORKING, but it wasn’t being held securely in place. So it wasn’t ACTUALLY WORKING. Anyway, not having a nut to replace the lost one, I used the wire hanger to fasten the lock to the frame until I can get to a hardware store (or my brother-in-law’s garage) and fix things correctly.

Sometimes you simply do the best you can.

5. What the hell, San Francisco?

This morning after cleaning up and packing my things, I drove Tom Collins to a park and hiked in the direction of the Golden Gate Bridge. And whereas I was really looking forward to seeing and having my picture taken with this iconic monument, it was almost completely covered in freakin’ fog.

But what can you do?

6. Come on, universe

Fresh off The Golden Gate Disappointment of 2018, I went for a sourdough bread bowl, something one of my friends recommended. Wouldn’t you know it? They’d JUST sold out.

So I ate a sourdough sandwich instead.

And whereas the sandwich as a whole was extremely tasty, the bread was THE HARDEST thing I’ve ever tried to chew in my entire life.

7. Finally– a win

My last stop before leaving town was ANOTHER bookstore, where I ended up getting two books–a children’s book I’ve wanted for a while, and a book on alchemy and mysticism. So that was fun. Plus, there was a sign out front that said, “Don’t let the bastards grind you down.”

Hear, hear.

8. You’ve got to be kidding

Leaving San Francisco took FOREVER, I guess because there’s only one bridge out in the direction I was going, and there was a wreck (or two or three) nearby. (There was SO MUCH traffic.) So what should have been a three or four-hour drive to Fresno (where I am now, visiting relatives), took six. Nonetheless, I’m here–safe and sound.

9. It all catches up

Now it’s thirty minutes before midnight, and I’m worn out. All the dancing and all the driving has obviously taken its toll.

So for now–

I’m done.

But I should be clear.

It’s been a good day.

Life doesn’t suck.

Quotes from CoCo (Marcus)

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Nothing was made to last forever.

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