It’s almost two in the morning, and I’m just sitting, well, lying down to blog; it’s been a full day. This afternoon I finally dropped my laptop off to be repaired. It was worth the wait; I was extremely pleased with the customer service I received and believe my liquid-damaged keyboard will be repaired as cheaply as possible. Plus, they said I should have it back within a week.
Afterwards I dropped my car off to have the oil changed. Touching on yesterday’s blog about listening to my gut or intuition, this is something my internal guidance has been nagging me about for weeks. Well, as it turns out, I needed new brake pads. Like, bad. And whereas I was initially bummed about dropping the extra cash, I’m now realize that I may have been spared further troubles down the road.
Get it, down the road?
But seriously, this is part of car ownership, and I want my brakes to work. In all things, having forward momentum is good, but so is being able to slow down, and so is being able to stop.
After the car thing, randomly–and I’m intentionally about to be vague–an acquaintance tried to shame me when they found out I made dinner (toast and peanut butter) for me and not my mom. “Shame on you,” they said. And whereas the old Marcus would have put up with this nonsense, the new Marcus put down his toast, straightened his shoulders, and said, “Don’t talk to me like that.” Then they said it again. “Shame on you.” So I looked them in the eyes and said, “I don’t accept shame from other people.”
I hate situations like this, when you’re just trying to eat a damn piece of toast and someone takes a swing at you. Not that I think this person was truly meaning to make me feel like a shit human being for not proactively offering to share my peanut butter with my mother, but words matter, carry intent, and have an impact, and a phase like “shame on you,” in my opinion, does nothing but belittle, disempower, and tear down. So despite the fact that I don’t relish confronting someone, I’m no longer willing to let another person use this phrase with me or otherwise dictate to me what my actions or emotions should be.
As the saying goes, we teach people how to treat us.
Phew.
This evening my friend Bonnie and I went to see Bohemian Rhapsody, the new biopic about Freddie Mercury, the lead singer of Queen. This is something I rarely do, see a film the night it’s released. But come on–it’s Freddie Mercury. Personally, I had a fabulous time, and when the movie was over, the entire theater clapped. Well, it’s possible that the guy who audibly groaned when Freddie kissed another guy (he was gay) didn’t clap, but still.
Also, don’t be surprised when a movie about a band named QUEEN shows two guys kissing.
After the movie, Bonnie and I hung out back at her house with her husband, Todd. As much as the movie was enjoyable, this was too, a relaxing evening of catch-up and friendship.
Now I’m ready to go to bed. Thinking about the day, it occurs to that I often make a big emotional production about everyday events. My laptop broke, I need new brakes, the sky is falling. But this is all part of life. As Freddie said in the movie tonight, “Don’t be so dramatic, darling.” Likewise, confrontation is part of life. Sometimes you have to put the brakes on. That’s enough. No matter. Eventually you move on down the road.
Quotes from CoCo (Marcus)
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Aren’t you perfect just the way you are?
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