It Doesn’t Taste Like Chocolate (Blog #676)

Holy cow. The sun was out today. Talk about marvelous. It was warm and everything, so warm, in fact, that I went for a walk around the neighborhood. And whereas my knee, which I recently had surgery on, required me to go slow, I did it. Made some vitamin D, burned a few calories, and cheered myself right up. To God be the glory, great things he hath done.

This afternoon I went grocery shopping, first to the health food store for fermented things, then to Aldi’s for everything else. Last week when I went, it took forever, but today I was in and out of both stores within an hour. This is thanks to the fact that I’m eating clean and, therefore, only like six things. And now that I know where they are, well, shopping is easy peasy.

What’s not easy peasy, apparently, is opening a can of tuna, which I tried to do when I got home from shopping because I was hungry. Y’all, that little pull tab snapped right off, so I tried opening the can with a screwdriver. This is a good idea, I thought, but it wasn’t. I guess those cans are under pressure (aren’t we all?); I got it open, but the tuna splattered everywhere. The kitchen looked like a toddler had contracted salmonella.

Now I’m doing laundry.

Once I cleaned up the tuna mess, I opened another can of tuna and made a salad–lettuce, onions, carrots, nuts, all the healthy things. Do you guys have any idea how long it takes to eat a salad? Seriously, there’s so much chewing. (I’ve never had this problem with a chocolate malt.) When I finally finished, I was stuffed. Now it’s forty-five minutes later, and I’m starving. What the hell, salad? (This is why people don’t like you.) Granted, I’m not bloated and can sit down without unbuttoning my jeans, but I’m pretty sure I could go back to cheeseburgers and get the same effect with an elastic waistband.

Despite my issue with salads (like my previous boyfriends, they have no staying power), I’m enjoying my new diet, which amounts to little or no wheat/gluten, dairy, sugar, and alcohol. Although sometimes tired, my body feels better, less heavy. Plus, my skin issues have been steadily improving, as has (I think, maybe, hopefully) my stomach. Likewise, I can see improvements from my knee rehab and workout routine. Still, I get frustrated that results aren’t instantaneous (presto change-o) and also get bored with doing the same thing every day, every damn day. This is part of the reason I’ve been looking for different exercises to do online and even–gasp–eating salads (because chicken and rice was getting old).

Recently a friend asked me if I still enjoyed writing (the blog). The short answer is yes. At the same time, it’s not EXCITING like it was in the beginning. But not because it’s not fun or rewarding, but because it’s not the beginning. That’s the deal, if you’re excited about something, you’re probably just getting started with it. Excitement has to do with the new, the novel. The place you get results, however, has to do with the routine, the ho-hum haven’t-we-done-this-a-million-times-before? Sadly, sticking with something isn’t sexy, and it doesn’t taste like chocolate. Still, it is satisfying to grind it out day after day then look back and see what you’ve done, what you’ve created, or how you’ve transformed. And good, I think, that the process of change isn’t exciting from start to finish, since then you’re challenged to master not only the thing–the diet, the exercise program, the writing–but also yourself–your thoughts, your emotions, your will, or anything else that would tell you to quit rather than keep going.

Quotes from CoCo (Marcus)

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Your life is a mystery. But you can relax. It’s not your job to solve it.

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