It’s ten o’clock, and the Super Bowl is officially over. This should come as no surprise, but I didn’t see a single second of it, Halftime Show and commercials included. While millions of other people were gathered around their televisions cheering and groaning, visiting with friends, and drinking beer, I was reading a book on customer service, doing laundry, and ordering probiotics on Amazon. It’s a sexy life, I know.
Here’s something weird.
Several weeks ago a friend told me about a healer named Charlie Goldsmith. I guess there was a television series about him recently on TLC, and a lot of people claim he’s healed them either in person or at a distance. (Having read quite a bit about alternative healing methods, I don’t have any problem believing this sort of thing is possible.) Anyway, my friend said Charlie sometimes does group healing sessions for people on his email list, so I went to his website and signed up. (Why not? It was free.) Well, there was a healing session yesterday, so earlier in the day I did as instructed and wrote down my health concerns. Then when the appointed time came, I put away all distractions and simply lay in bed.
Like, I’m waiting.
Y’all, get this shit. A few minutes before the official start time, I felt warmth coming into my stomach. I felt like I was standing in front of a hand dryer. For the next ten minutes (the length of the session), this feeling came and went. There weren’t any instructions about what to do with my hands, but I intuited that I needed to place them on my stomach, heart, and shoulders, which I did. Well, wherever my hands went, the heat would follow. Since this sometimes happens when I practice Reiki, I honestly didn’t think too much about it, but later my friend said she’d had a similar experience, and several people online said the same. (Several people online also said they didn’t feel shit. So there’s that.) Neither my friend or I experienced a change in symptoms.
Last night I listened to a guided imagery CD designed for healing the effects of trauma. Guided imagery is, essentially, visualization and affirmations. There’s actually more to it than that, but I can’t tell you what it is because I fell asleep during the first five minutes of the CD. (They say this is okay, since your subconscious still gets the message, but my subconscious isn’t writing this blog.) Anyway, I was snoring and everything. I think the total program was sixty minutes, and I woke up for the last fifteen minutes of the affirmation section. So I can tell you that part was stellar, and the other part was–at the very least–good for a nap.
Later I was “up all night,” mostly watching Netflix. I think it was three or four before I actually fell asleep. I didn’t set an alarm, but I’d planned on getting up around ten or eleven during one of my “bathroom breaks” to meet some friends for brunch. Well, that didn’t happen. Y’all, I don’t know if it was Charlie the Healer or the guided imagery CD (or both), but I didn’t wake up until one this afternoon. Like, I didn’t get up to go to the bathroom or anything. I slept like a rock. It felt great.
I still have no idea how my bladder did it.
It’s enough.
Despite the wonderful sleep last night, I’ve dragged ass all day. Currently I’m ready to wrap this up and get ready for bed. I think if I could sleep like I did last night more often, it could only help. But who knows what will happen? And who knows what happened yesterday? Today I started to get frustrated about being sick but then remembered that being ill lately has afforded me a lot of time to read and to learn, and I wouldn’t trade any of that. (As if I have a choice in the matter.) More and more, I’m okay with not having all the answers. Like, I don’t need to know why I’m sick or exactly how to fix it. I don’t need to know how the universe works or be able to understand every weird thing that happens. Rather, I’m learning that it’s enough that things happen as they do. It’s enough to be right here, right now. It’s enough to sit in, and sometimes drag ass through, the mystery.
Quotes from CoCo (Marcus)
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More often than not, the truth is a monster. It gets in your face and makes you get honest. Sometimes the truth separates you from people you care about, if for no other reason than to bring you closer to yourself.
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